Parenting remains the hub of nation building. I am not flippant about this, I mean the coordinating axle of our entire social life. So for every being to enjoy a great social life it then behoves on every individual who is a unit of the family to play a vital role for the society to experience same. No society is an isolation of the total sum of the inherent behaviors of its citizens. Our present value system and who we are is a product of our upbringing; from the beliefs systems we allow to have free expression in our daily lives to our deeds, habits, and character. All these we pick from those who raise us with a strong combination of nature and nurture.
To rescue the situation is to go through the route of the processes of child’s upbringing with a view to doing a bettwr job than before.
RAISING VALUE BASED CHILDREN means that. Ideologies, Culture and Institutions thrive on values. The validation and authenticity of our existence however isn’t known and defined by the standard of our business and career successes, positional relevances, or wealth , etc…..but by values. Value based children shapes the socio-political space of nations for the best.
Value based Children ignites the drive to set the pace for a new progressive social order in spheres of influence.
Value based children grow with in-built social mechanism belief system to spot the difference between a right and a wrong behavior.
Values has become such a popular word in recent years, especially preceded by the word “family”. To talk about values is to talk about what kind of a person you want your child to be. Truth is most parents aspire to a short list of universals: honesty, compassion, trustworthiness, generosity, courtesy, fairness, self- respect, respect for others … and many more.
So the question remain how do we raise our children to grow with right values?
We must bear in mind that values are not taught but they are caught. We live and thrive in an environment where we learn by observation; children with their impressionable mind watch what we parents do and replicate same.
I have few suggestions for parents to roll with.
1. Parenting is you. It’s about your life and what you represent in and out. Who we are with respect to our Faith inclination, family belief systems, values of integrity, dignity, honesty, trustworthiness, self discipline, and all… it thus behoves on us parents that before we beging to talk of raising our children with value, values must exude in oir daily lives. Values are caught. Children are the best recorder but the worst interpreters.
2. Connect to the child. You cannot barb my hair in my absence, goes the Yoruba adage. We’d not be able to infuse into our children the rigjt values if we aren’t able to conncet with them. Connecting with them is all about plugging into the best moment to gain their highest attention. And this will ultimately empower them to embrace the learning within.
3. Clarity of the value. Parents should endeavor that their words, emotions, and actions are unambiguously and easily communicated to the child. Trying to convey too many messages to our children at one time impedes their learning culture. The best strategy is to choose and focus on a few lines of instruction that are most age appropriate to them
4. Power of positive experience will go a long way in reinforcing positive values in kids. One of the best ways to do this is sharing tales and stories to drive home the understanding of the value to them.
5. Power of self story. We should endeavor to tell our kids stories about our own struggles amd failures. Stories of our past flops, failures, disappointments, and fumbles will propel them to approach life with a different perspective. Storytelling is one of the greatest tools we have for engaging children on complex social, values, and environmental issues, in ways that can drive belief and behavioral change and as such , has the power to influence future beliefs on related issues.
Our dealings with our children must be guided by good concience and intuition led reasoning. No nation rises above its dominant belief systems. If the present Kings aren’t doing right things in term of values, the best time to raise new set of kings is NOW.
Parenting Development Expert